Pete Hegseth performs slam poetry at ‘SNL’s Cold Open’

Saturday night Live He took the upcoming midterm elections in the United States as an opportunity to shatter many of his assumptions about prominent members of the Republican Party.

In the October 3 cold opening, Republican National Committee staffers (Andrew Dismukes and Ashley Padilla) invite Republican politicians to film commercials asking their base to get out and vote. First up is Secretary of State Marco Rubio (Marcelo Hernandez), who gives an impassioned speech in Spanish about how Trump “betrayed” everyone, including him. Then along comes wheelchair-bound Senator Mitch McConnell (Mickey Day), who throws up a peace sign and at the wrong moment yells “Live from New York, it’s Saturday Night!” Saying this almost eliminates the cold.

After a brief appearance from Vice President J.D. Vance (Jeremy Culhane), whose endorsement (and presidential ambitions) are hastily dismissed, the cold open ramps up the dude brother’s aggressiveness with the appearance of Colin Jost’s Pete Hegseth. He chugs Berro (“Spider-Man’s New Non-Alcoholic Bitch Beer”) and hurls some insults at the audience (“Shlong Ass”) and orders everyone to “do the gayest thing ever and vote.” Things get surreal when he breaks into some weird slam poetry complete with bongos, homophobia and transphobia.

Of course, it won’t be 2026 snl James Austin Johnson’s cold open without the presence of President Trump, who is ready to refuse any election result that doesn’t go his party’s way. Foggy! But at least the bongos are fun.